Life and Farm Ramblings

 Life and Farm Ramblings...

 

 

For the moment, I can't even call this coffee chat. I haven't been able to drive coffee for nearly 3 weeks, and that makes me pretty sad. I got really sick a few weeks back, and it has completely uprooted my life. I've managed to keep off the internet because I am trying to focus on healing, but it kind of feels like being being ambushed by a dozen different illnesses, all at once. That illness resulted in me quitting smoking, after a week that all I could do was sleep...smoking and eating did not matter. Since then, I'm slowly getting a little more energy back, but still battling to eat much at a serving and going on 3 weeks without a cigarette throws in a whole other mess to the mix. The awful coughing, tastes changing(everything still tastes like ass), sinuses and allergies in a tail spin as they try to readjust to the nicotine/tar/carbon monoxide being out of my body. So, recovering from a flu and adding in the quitting smoking...it's not been a pleasant few weeks. I know I will feel much better once I get through the worst of this but right now...I'm really contemplating the benefits with how bad I have felt. 

 

So, along with everything I mentioned earlier, we started our 2025 lambing season on the 25th of January. This year, we had 65 ewes that should have been bred. We had a few slow days, but very few. As of today(2/24/25), we have had 60 ewes give birth to 119 lambs. We still have 5 that are straggling, and only 2 of those are visibly bred. So, we'll see how that all turns out. We have had some chaos, that is expected with that many sheep. Richard had to pull several babies this year. Even with the extreme cold snaps, we have had minimal loss. We have 4 bottle babies this year, which is the most we've had for a bit. We are sitting pretty good on hay, and knowing there's about 10-12 weeks left before we can turn out on pasture is reassuring. I am really happy we have our chickens still. Saturday, I went to the store and decided to look at egg prices. OUCH! An 18 pack of best choice white eggs, $13.95. I do believe if I hear anyone complain about $2-$3 a dozen of my eggs....they will be dodging them as I throw the eggs at them! 

 

Just a couple weeks and my baby will be 16. It's unbelievable how quickly the time with my kids has gone. I suppose every parent feels this, and I am no exception. My baby turning 16, has really been hard though. I have loved being a full time mom. I have loved my kids, and all the kids that adopted our family as part of their chosen family. I tried to raise my kids to understand the importance of putting our family first. I personally worked through a lot of traumas to give my kids everything that I wished for growing up. I have made plenty of mistakes as a parent, every parent has, but loving them - unconditionally, has not been one of them. When my oldest got married, I was happy to have a daughter-in-law I thought I had gotten to know pretty well. One phrase that I was told about a year ago, has sadly been accurate. "A son is a son, until he takes a wife; a daughter is a daughter, for the rest of your life." It's been a difficult transition to go from a house full of young people, to only one. It's difficult to watch as the ones we raise choose to remove you from their their life and idolize poor behavior. I can just hope that when these young people become parents, they find some wisdom in the direction I tried to lead them.

 

I have had to really back off on everything that has not been focused on getting myself healthy again. Each day, I am feeling a little more human, and will be getting back in the saddle with everything. The big priorities right now, are the Disabled Veteran Hunt and the gardening. I need to touch base with a couple of the non-profits we have worked with, and get a plan in place with them; and get their sponsorship pledges in the books. I have  secured 4 donation pledges since the first of the year. I will be working to secure our raffle items over the coming month, and we will be securing our disabled veteran hunters in June. 

 

Gardening for this year is going to look a little different. Since there are just 3 of us now, I no longer have to plan for hundreds of jars of food each year. So, I am going to try my hand at some fun gardening - containers, raised beds, patches thrown in where ever the urge hits, and some flower gardens too. I will be on the look out for trees, fruit trees, berry bushes, and some wind block trees too. I will still be canning, but I definitely don't need 800 plus jars each year. 

 

Well, that's the nutshell ramblings to catch up. I'm sure there is plenty I missed, but this covers most of it. 

 

Coffee and Conversation

 

I will be the first to admit, I do not know everything. Honestly, I know a lot about a lot of areas, and am a master of none. I tend to follow the directions my interests take me. I'm curious, and become fully engulfed in learning where/when I can. While some lessons, I'd rather not learn...I do try to, so I don't have to repeat them. I am only human, which means, there are plenty of areas that I am ignorant to; areas that do not effect or touch my life. It's truly a dichotomy. 

My personal areas of knowledge do have a large range, but focus on my family, Veterans, gardening, cooking, and research. The past decade, I've dove off into government, politics, ancient customs(religious beliefs), ancestry and state/local law. My underlying belief is that you don't know, what you don't know, until you learn it. That statement has made a huge impact on my life.

The past week, has been a busy and strange one. I've had an encounter that I had never experienced and never want to again. We are in lambing season, which means a lot of late nights/early mornings...and lots of walks to and from the barn, all day. We have entered into the second half of this home school year. It's time to get paperwork in order for taxes. I'm trying to get unfinished projects tied up, so I can finally move on to some new ones. I have barely made any gardening plans, because I just have not had the extra energy. I have worked on our annual veteran hunt plans, but I am concerned how to manage sponsorships, supplies, and equipment - when you work with other groups, you have to work with their schedules and I don't want to nag at people. Of course, there is the budget to contend with...which is a challenge when everything except your income is increasing. 

Writing has always been my outlet for stress. It tends to get frustrating when there is so much I would love to say and talk about, but I just don't feel putting most of my life online, is a great idea. That is when and why I tend to withdraw. I am not feeling that my way of expressing or communicating is effective. I have shared some of my experiences, some knowledge that I have learned - sometimes the hard way, and things that I would personally do different if I could. The thing that gets me, there are actually people that want to argue about how you should feel, how you should do things, and refuse to educate themselves while belittling those that do. It's truly incredible. 

I've made plenty of comments about not being a people person. Honestly, that is not accurate. I love people, and getting to know people does improve my own knowledge. What I can not stand is those that have to constantly one-up you, that refuse to listen to anything outside their knowledge, constant gossip(which is bad since I live in a county that is a gossip mill!), and those that refuse to accept responsibilities for their own actions. It's interesting to tell people that I don't hate anyone...the response always floors me. I have had people start naming lists of people they hate. I don't. I may hate a situation/circumstance, but hate is such a negative and defining emotion. It's dark and ugly. It breaks down any open communication in relationships, and sets a path of negativity in nearly all circumstances. While I personally have experienced some of that negativity the last several years...I have also known when to course correct. I learned when I was younger that self-responsibility is a must. This means you have to change your thought process, change the group of people you spend time with, change your situation, or whatever is necessary to become a better person. Ultimately, it is my responsibility to fix me, because sometimes, I am the problem. 

Today, I have a continued busy schedule but am reminded to take some down time too. Being constantly busy, doesn't equal productive. Being productive, doesn't just mean getting things done...it also means taking time to visit, time to reflect/meditate, enjoying the new lives on our farm, not rushing through lessons to get to the independent study time because those side conversations matter just as much! Taking the few minutes to look over the garden lists, and dream a little. 

We get so busy making a living, that we forget to make a life...at least one, we don't need a vacation from. Sometimes, we have to take a step back and remember why we chose the direction we are going. I pray each of you has a great first week of February.