Such a roller coaster of emotions over the past week.

The past 7 days have proven to be quite an emotional experience. With the world seemingly getting crazier by the day, throw in crazy weather patterns, remembering a dear friend, and that is mostly outside of our immediate home. As the weekend proceeds, I hope to find some peace as I connect with nature.

The week began with 2 explosions that shook the finish line of the Boston Marathon. While I watched the end of the race, it became a television speculation that it was a terrorist attack. That became a very uneasy gut feeling for me. My thoughts raced as I was concerned for all those involved, and then anger over who may have done this; on our soil, during something so seemingly mute. By Thursday they had released 2 photos of suspects. I opened the computer to find breaking news Friday morning of a shootout between the suspects and police...only to find that one had died and one had escaped. I watched the live coverage, was shocked to hear that the area was on lock down, and then 8 hours later they lifted that lock down with no one in custody. Then the breaking news again that they were on a lock down in a single town with the suspect found. Only to watch the drama play out of the capture. While I am angry at the loss of life and limb for those involved in the marathon, and the shoot outs, I am reserved in judgement. This was a national media focus, and our laws state that those accused are entitled to a fair, speedy trial. How can anyone receive a fair trial when such a drama is unfolded on national media, broadcast to just about every country in the world? Yes, I would like to see the remaining suspect tried, and if found guilty to receive the maximum sentence allowed, but with so many closed-minded individuals and so much media spotlight...I just don't see how this suspect will receive a fair trial even though I'm sure he will be found guilty. Too much of the drama spotlights on national television are not able to receive fair trails, and by today's thoughtless process, they are guilty until proven innocent.

This week also brought some crazy weather patterns. My hometown area was hit with over 7 inches of rain over 24 hours. My area got 5. The flooding, damage and destruction of the floods is incomprehensible. The town I lived in my first apartment, over half the town under water. Barges broke loose, hit the dam, and caused the levees to breach. My brother and his wife, and my sister and her husband live in that town. I continue to pray for them, the remaining friends I have in that town, and all the people there. The town I was born in, had a lot of flooding as well. Their hospital ended up being evacuated due to flood waters entering it. A town that I spent a lot of time in, is also under water. This town was a sacred spot to me. One that I could connect with nature, and the Native heritage I am so proud of. Seeing pictures of my hometown area, and even my local areas that have been hit by flooding is heart breaking. I am sending each of these area many positive thoughts, and hoping that we can all dry out a little and enjoy spring.

Friday was one of my dearests friends birthday. A year and a half ago, he went missing only to be found deceased a short while later. He would have been 38. He was one of the first friends I had when I moved to my Dad's in high school. He was always there for me, always giving me a push to better myself, and was one of those guys that everyone loved. It was always his farm we went to for bonfires, it was his farm that felt like home to me. There were many conversations on that farm, that were intense and wide-ranging. It was on his farm, and around him that helped me to open up and meet so many people and even one of my other best friends to this day. It was because of him that I made it through high school, without the fate of his life. It was because of him that I was able to combat an eating disorder that only a handful of people even knew about. I can only hope that after his passing that he was able to find the peace and health he couldn't find here on Earth. Happy Birthday Bobby!

Here at home, it's been months of emotional up and downs. While I try to stay positive, some days are just more than even I can handle. The Winter and early Spring has been harsh for our little homestead. After losing 2 cows, 2 calves and countless chickens...to weather and predators, it's almost more than I can handle. We are selling off all but one heifer, have bought more chickens hopefully to replace what we have lost, and are spending the next 8 months finishing up projects that have been on-going for over a year. We are finally going to have a deck on the front of the house, gravel in the driveway, an orchard, several trees, several flower beds, a fenced area, and will be putting up more hay. We will be working with 2 fillies this year to get them broke, will be having piglets in about a month, a calf in September and hay in June/July. I want to have time for some bonfires, and lots of gardening!

This weekend is time for some decompressing. It's time to get outdoors. Time for some tree planting, and gardens. Time for connecting with nature and releasing some pent up energy.

Remember that it not our job to judge, not our job to catagorize anyone. It is our job to stay diligent, and be involved in our communities. Help our neighbors, friends and family.