It is truly astounding how weird the times have become. So much noise all the time, yet nothing of particular importance. It's a barrage of pathetic politics, media not delivering news, religious folks determining it's the end of times, educated idiots supposedly "know what's best" and all of a sudden any deaths NOT directly from Covid-19 have miraculously disappeared. We are constantly being given half information that so many are taking and exploiting. Now, before I get ambushed with lots of hate messages, as I typically do after voicing my own opinions, save your time and energy...you have your opinion, I have mine. I will respect your opinion. Just because we may disagree gives me ZERO rights to think poorly of you. I just ask for the same respect.
You see, I know how strong-willed, hard headed, stubborn and opinionated I am. I've dealt with the consequences of that my entire life! I went from being a kid, to being a kid from divorced parents, to a kid raising siblings, to being expected to be a kid again after raising kids, to a young adult who thought I knew everything, to so many trials unexpected, to being a mom, to cancer, to miscarriages, to a surprise child, to being forced to learn holistic medicine because of health issues with that child, to early menopause...that I am still dealing with. I learned early on that learning everything I could possibly learn, would only help me. I went on to earn an Associates in Business, and multiple certificates with honors over the past 26 years. I have very independent views in politics, I am spiritual but not religious. I have an opinion about life that I wish more had..."TO EACH THEIR OWN." I am no where near perfect, there fore...I have ZERO right to judge anyone else. I believe in being kind but not a door mat. I have been pushed to the point of no longer being kind, and then accused of being mean. I have been down and brought back up when I have seen unselfish acts. I will help anyone I can until I feel that I am taken advantage of. I am honest and blunt to a fault, but I attempt to be as tactful as I can. I am reserved when I am not comfortable around someone, but I am an open book with those I trust. Trust is something that is difficult for me. I will always try to find the good in people even if I'm told there is none...until I see otherwise. I tend to be too caring, too empathetic, and too compassionate. I always try to see both sides of a story.
All that being said, I have plenty of faults! I have this weird twist of responsibility and free spirit. I go out of my way to always remain professional and friendly even when under my breath I am cussing like a sailor. The few that know me well enough, can read my expressions and see my true thoughts in my eyes. Those that can't, and there are a LOT, never pay attention to anything. I have moments when procrastination is my biggest enemy. I tend to get restless. When that happens, it's never a good thing. I hate stereotypes, expectations, and stringent routines. I refuse to do things, on a daily basis, that do not bring me happiness/fulfillment/peace. I tend to have a control issue. I like to have control over my environment, and when I don't...it's ugly! When I am upset/angry, I tend to withdraw from everyone and everything until I have a grasp on how to handle whatever sent me spiraling.
I have spent nearly 10 years working with a group of Holistic providers through a private group. It's a lot of statistics, a lot of studies, and a challenging change of view from the modern ways of thinking. It has provided me an opportunity to learn and grow, but also given me an opportunity to expand my own thinking. Since so much of modern medicine is all about treating symptoms and prescribing medicine; the Holistic approach is more of a mind/body/spirit approach to maximize optimum health. Having an open mind, has helped me to expand my horizons, and not be stuck in a societal norm of only seeing black & white.
With the lessons of above, I learned more about a spiritual approach. I have never felt comfortable in a religious realm. My personal beliefs did not adhere nor jive with any religion I studied. As I have taught my own kids with an eclectic curriculum, my beliefs fell into that category too. I've had too many experiences, in my life, to believe in a strict religious code. I pray, meditate, practice yoga, practice grounding, strive to keep my chakras open, love Reiki therapy, and keep up with the moons changing phases. I love the metaphysics and quantum physics, even if I don't fully understand everything yet.
As life is totally in a tailspin lately, I have really struggled. My life has not really changed all that much. The biggest difference has been having my entire family home 24/7. There have been 3 meals a day, for 5 people, laundry is unmanageable for the most part, and the amount of dishes has increased. We do not get away from the farm much, so nothing has changed in that regard. I still get groceries as I need to, although the stupidity of finding toilet paper/paper towels/cleaning supplies is enough to send me into instant attitude. Fortunately, I learned years ago how to utilize many other products to get better results than chemical cleaners. The problem comes in, for me, when I can not get what I need because some douche bag has hoarded supplies. I have spent several years now working with people outside of my home. I miss them terribly!!!! I am looking forward to being able to see them again when some of the stupidity has eased. Even though I am concerned as to what the remainder of this year will hold.
As I write, I am hoping some of my own unease will diminish. As someone who trusts my gut instincts, I am hopeful that some of the vibes I have felt are just due to the extreme emotions going on in society. I am going to end this blog, but I am going to encourage each of that reads this to find a way to be kind. Remember that it takes all types to make this world go round. We may all have differing opinions, but it does not mean one opinion or another are 100% right. Think for yourself, do your own research, turn off the news, and remember that we are all just doing what we feel is best for ourselves and our families.
Salli
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