I began writing these blogs years ago. When I began, you could still talk about everything without censorship, without a bunch of butt-hurt, and have actual conversations - even when you disagreed. It's incredible how much has changed in 7 years. I still write but I am more cautious of my wording, and I tend to get private messages that are not very nice, especially when I write about certain subjects. For me, I write my own beliefs. I will not discredit anyone else's but I write what I know, and many subjects I have researched to death. I do not watch television, so my information comes from research or personal knowledge. I appreciate different views, when they are educated. Not those that are just hell bent to stay in their padded and lined comfort zone boxes. With that said, this coffee chat will begin with some chatter, some personal experiences and where it goes from there...will depend on my mood!
I've had a bit of a balancing act to manage for a while now. I have to say, some days are better than others! I have been told most of my life that I need to toughen up. I cared too much, I gave too many chances, or I was too empathetic. I felt discounted for just being me. I do care about people, and I follow my heart and intuition. Many people have expressed that my caring nature was actually a bad thing. So, from my own perspective; yep, I've been hurt, a LOT! I have had to live and learn, wipe myself off when I've been used as a door mat, and remind myself that the only opinion of me that matters....is my own. No one else can define my worth, define my value or determine my character. Unfortunately, I found myself in a few situations that I allowed to have outside opinion, weigh inside more than it should have. My hope is that something I write about will actually help, even if just one person, to realize they are not alone, and help them to pick themselves up and better themselves. Despite whatever carnage may be laying around them.
Years ago, I learned about being an empathic person. Not only do we over think everything, we over feel everything too! It's truly a blessing and a curse. Being empathic, means having people stop you in the middle of a store to tell you their life story, it means feeling the emotions of people without even trying. It means always giving the benefit of doubt, and trying to find the good in others...sometimes, realizing too late that there isn't any good to be found. It's sensing the feelings behind messages, and words; even when the words aren't said. Overall, it means running on emotional and mental burn out, all the time. It also means, caring too much for others, that don't care about you. It's a hard pill to swallow. For some of us, it means having to withdraw from everything. Whether that means from family, friends, plans...and when things get really overwhelming, you withdraw from everything and everyone. You go into a shut down mode, and just exist. Which is very difficult for an empath. We are social by nature, but only with people that put off the "right" vibe. When we feel something that doesn't feel right, we withdraw and become more introverted. However, empathic people want to be able to help others, to lend an ear to listen, give a hand up, or just spread care into a world that has become very self-centered.
With that nonsense out of the way, I want to move on to some other topics. I don't watch television. I don't have the desire to watch series of shows, or binge on NetFlix. Instead, I research, read, and expand my thoughts. I am very open minded, even if skeptical of some areas. I've learned to utilize online libraries and news sources from around the world. You know the phrase, "there's 2 sides to every story?" Well, I believe there are actually 3 sides....the left side, the right side and somewhere in the middle you can start to find truth. The problem I have found the past 3 years, so much of what we have been taught, read or are told; is fiction. It's really quite sad. The 1948 Smith-Mundt Act, was revised by the former Obama administration, to allow propaganda to be used on the Americans citizens. Prior to this revision, it was not. Just as the Patriot Act that was instituted by former President Bush, was written long before the 9/11 attack. All the Covid stuff began long ago too, I'm researched back to 2005 and still digging. The JFK assassination was yet another lie. World War 1 & 2, Vietnam, Korea, Cuba, Bosnia; none are actually what we have been told. The Federal Reserve, Titanic, IRS, and the Act of 1871...all lies and illegal. But, don't take my word for it. I only know what I have spent years now digging into. There is truly too much for me to write in my coffee chats. Besides, few would actually believe anything unless they hear it from the television anyway.
I remember growing up, being told there were 3 topics never discussed; politics, religion, and voting. On a side note here, while it wasn't really ever said, sex was another. Well, we now know, that all went to hell in a handbasket! Now, we have children being sexualized in television, in theme parks, and the trafficking rings(that involve most at the top) are a multi-billion dollar industry. We have relationships now being extorted and used as a means of dividing us. We have God given skin color, gender, and economic "class" being used as divisions. One question I keep asking is: "where the hell are all these feminist movement people, while women's sports are being extorted by men?" Was that whole movement just a cover for something else? I personally have no issue with loving who you love, if you choose to dress as the opposite gender, or what your coloring may be. My own discrimination comes in from character. If you behave as a civilized, productive and decent person - that is how I will treat you. If you behave like trash, entitled and worthless - again, that is how I will treat you. The majority of Americans are good, hardworking, decent people. The problem is everyone wants a right, but too many don't want to take a responsibility. Does anyone else remember, "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?"
I do my best to keep my mouth shut. That is a major challenge, and those that know me, know I don't usually do well with that. Typically, if my mouth doesn't say it....my face will. Then again, with all the face diapers people are still wearing, I guess seeing facial expressions are a thing of the past too. Although returning to my youth is not something I would ever want to do, I do wish I could go back to the times of running through our neighborhoods with the kids I grew up with - bullies and all. When the neighbors all watched out for all the kids, even the ones that didn't belong to them. When we knew we had to be home when the porch lights came on, playing in the creek was the biggest fun and also a huge no-no. Riding bikes, walking, and popping tar bubbles on the side of the road was still fun. Nights you chase down fireflies and put them in mason jars, having chores at home and helping your friends to do theirs too. When neighbors would get together, the neighborhood kids would show up at your house because they wanted to be with a family when theirs wasn't the best. Playing with hotwheels cars in the rocks and dirt, or Tonka trucks that were still metal! It's amazing to think back to how simple life was. Even though we were kids, we knew there were hardships for the adults, but we weren't burdened by them. The adults kept adult conversation mostly away from the kids. It allowed the kids to be kids. We weren't running from one extra-curricular event to another, that was unheard of. You learned to find something to do if you were "bored." You learned to deal with bored, you learned to deal with not making a team or whatever. No one got a free pass. You worked hard to be the best, or you worked hard to try again next year. We didn't know our teachers political views or sexual orientation...they actually taught education - reading, writing, math.
It's difficult to look back at how much has changed in 35+ years. Divorce has become a common place, parents working stupid hours to keep up with the trends and children that don't know how to just be children. The constant influx of technology has ruined most traditional and family values. So many have become unproductive members of society, depending on the government or some ridiculous inclusion law to survive. Kids and adults now have to be constantly entertained, because boredom has become a bad thing. People have lost respect for themselves, you can tell by the way they act/dress/talk, in turn they don't respect others. God forbid you have a differing view point!! Then you are categorized again, ostracized and called racist. People can no longer have conversations, because rather than admit that they may not know or just disagree...they will argue and label you. If something you say disagrees with their mindset, you might as well just talk to a wall...or they quit talking to you all together.
It's truly become a sad state. However, I'm going to finish this up with a little positivity. While there are many that may be less respectful, this big, beautiful world is full of GOOD PEOPLE! People that are happy to just live and let live. People that don't care your gender, sexuality, color, or socio-economic class. They care about your character, they care about one another even if their opinions are different. These are the people that are going to rebuild a world that is beautiful again, that is caring, and that truly love thy neighbor again. It's these people that I choose to be around. It's these vibes, that I look for. Find your people, in your area or beyond.
Peace, love, and light
Salli
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