Coffee Chat - Turkey Chat...

 

It's a late Thanksgiving this year, and I'm really thankful for that! As I work through my never-ending lists, a later holiday has actually allowed me to catch up some. After spending so much time in the past few years, being sick or injured...rebuilding my health has been a difficult, and constant hurdle. I have started feeling more like myself, but the damage done, sometimes feels insurmountable. I know many won't understand but, I have always struggled to gain weight. When I stress, get sick, or get too overwhelmed...I lose weight, and quickly. I don't have much to lose. Gaining a pound or two back, is a major undertaking, let alone the nearly 25 I lost. With that also is the challenge of not being able to eat much at one time. If you think about when you get sick, and don't eat much. Your stomach actually does shrink to fit the intake of food. After a 2 year health battle, my husband said I wasn't eating enough to feed a bird, but I would eat as much as I could. So, it's been a big struggle, and added stresses only make matters worse.  Add in the joy of menopause, and the randomness of symptoms there...and the economic troubles, loss, and family...it's been tough. I struggled to enjoy so much of the outlets I once enjoyed, found myself feeling like I didn't really fit into anything, and there was more stress. While I began feeling a little lighter a couple months ago, September was a real turning point...so far.

I have always valued my independent steak and not needing recognition to do good things. I don't need them to succeed, but sometimes negativity begins to overrule even the most positive reinforcements. It's kind of funny to me to read the memes on social media about true friends, family and even spousal behaviors. If I followed those things, I'd be in serious trouble. Let's see if I can name a few: "if your spouse has a lock on their phone, they are hiding something from you." "If friends are true, they can see when there is a problem, even if you don't tell them." "Family - blood is thicker than water." "People will make time if it's important to them, no one is too busy." Geez, I could fill pages with this nonsense. It's really easy to understand why so many are depressed, jealous, and have gotten so set in a world of unrealistic. The more you are focused on negatives, the more you will get...that is just the way it is. I've started allowing myself to have a moment to whine about an issue, but then I turn it to this: "whining has gotten me no-where but more upset. How can fix whatever it is that is challenging me?" One area I really struggled with, after reaching out to others for help, lead me to a friend that helped me jump a hurdle I didn't know how to fix. Another area, I am working hard on, is the negativity. There is so much of it anymore, and it comes in so many forms. So much of it, is unnecessary, but we open our lives to world through social media and even our circles. I quit sharing the majority of my life on social media and even in my blogs. So, if people feel the need to gossip about me, that's all it is because no one outside my immediate family and inner circle knows what goes on here. That inner circle keeps getting smaller with poor behaviors. I'm not better than anyone else, and I don't try to be...but I work hard to be a better me, every single day. I'm finding that some positive recognition is quite nice. Having a few trusted people that I can turn to as friends that will listen to my nonsense, and then give me a fresh perspective to rebuild the steam I need to keep going, is invaluable! 

So, just getting some of these thoughts out today is helpful. I have 6 days to get ready for my absolute favorite meal of the year! I have a lot of people coming to celebrate Thanksgiving, and I am excited. I have quite a list of chores to check off, but there are great rewards this time of year. My beautiful Christmas decorations are going up, nearly all of the items needed for Thanksgiving have been gotten, and even getting the winter prep list knocked out has been happening. 

I pray each of you have a bountiful, healthy and happy Thanksgiving!

Nov. 15 coffee updates

 

 

 

I'm going to take a minute to pat myself on the back, I don't do this normally... I have been speaking in front of 25-50 people for several years. It's not a big deal. When I have a grasp on the topic at hand, it's quite easy for me. However, speaking to a group well over 100 people, with a few new talking points...OMG! Talk about nerve wracking! Not to mention the venue, was full of Veterans, the people I admire the most. I never want to appear foolish to them. I gave my speech it went a little off topic briefly, but I still fit it in a 10 minute window. It was a little intimidating seeing the program of speakers...Mike Mortensen - a combat veteran, Sgt. Patrick Perkins - another combat hero and President of Heroes Hunting Foundation, Scott Wright - Marine veteran, and Deb Moeller - Iowa City VA...and Me. I was one of very few non-veteran speakers. It was especially humbling. Even more so, it was the first time I had been able to attend the event, so I did not know how it worked. I know I will be much more prepared next time. I was able to make a few networking connections, that could help us to continue to improve our veteran hunt.  That is always my first priority, improving what we do, to give more back to our veterans. I have to give Van Buren County Veterans Affairs, VSO's Barbie & Marcella, a ton of credit for organizing not only such a big event but keeping it running smoothly. They did an incredible job! I can organize and plan with the best of them, but organized chaos can still be chaotic. 

I am venturing into our holiday season gatherings and decor beginning today. I'm still on a bit of high after last night. There is just a small amount of decorating(by my standards)left to do inside, and a little bit outside, and that will be finished. I have been taking pictures as I go, but not sharing too much on social media. I just haven't taken the time. I will later. I am pushing myself pretty hard this year, to find some spirit. My little girl is more excited for Christmas this year, than she has been for several years. It's a little easier to find that magical spirit when the people I spend all my time with, are bursting at the seems with it. Not to mention, a couple of exciting prospects have been added to my life, giving me more hope for better times ahead. I've said before, the past several years have been tough. 

So, with a blanket of fog to start the day...I will be working around the house. I have a little paperwork to deal with, and will be adding to my growing grocery list. It's a little ominous not being able to see beyond our vehicles, but it's kind of pretty too. I've seen the first forecast calling for some snow showers next week too. Guess that means it's time to wrap up the outdoor preps...the winter weather is going to make its first appearance. Remember to take time to count your blessings, and hug your loved ones a little tighter. Even though I've questioned this a lot, I still believe that family is our number 1 priority. Have blessed day and weekend.