Gratitude

GRATITUDE - NOUN
a feeling of appreciation or thanks



If you are on an social media site, you know all the meme's out there about gratitude. The ones that always frustrate me are the ones that seem to downgrade the frustrations each of us deal with, simple because most of regular frustrations are not life or death. Here's my thought, yes I know life could be so much worse. I know there are people out there without half of what I have, but the frustrations I have are big issues to me, personally. This does not mean I don't have empathy or sympathy for those with life so much worse than I do. It does, however, mean that I accept that my own frustrations are a rough spot in my life.

Gratitude is something I have looked for in every tough spot, and appreciate everyday. I have so many blessings in my life, and such an amazing little family that, even when they drive me crazy, are my reasons for continuing to move forward every single day. When I think of my blessings, I am reminded of the good spots in life, even when the day may not be so good. I have a beautiful, healthy family, a beautiful home on land that is not only part of my husband's family but land that I feel connected to. I am so fortunate to be with kids every single day, even on the days that I want to pull my hair out. I have been gifted with the love of learning, and I get to share that love with my kids. I am a strong person that has survived and thrived, even through some pretty bad storms. I was fortunate enough to have time on my own to find my strengths and weaknesses; and to be able to be independent with how I lived my life. Although we may not have everything we want, we have everything we need.

Being grateful for everything, is sometimes one of the hardest details to remember when you have a turbulent time in your life. It's easy to get sucked into the rabbit hole of gloom and doom, when issues overshadow your days. When you have multiple issues come crashing down, staying grateful can be the last thing you want to think about. It's difficult to focus when issues take hold. It's taken me years to finally be able to find a foot hold that allows me to stop, breath, and accept that a current issue may be bad or may weigh on me, but taking time every day to remind myself of everything I can be thankful for.

I have found, in my darkest times, it's those moments of stopping, breathing, and listing everything I am grateful for; that I can find the strength to keep moving. Some times, it's allowed me to clear my head enough to find a solution to a problem, to understand why the issue is happening, or even as simple as being able to say: "yes, this is bad and I don't have an answer yet, but I can get through this." Other times, the frustration carries on but I can get through a rough spot and calm down enough, over time, to be able to see through the issue clearer.

The past several years, I have turned to meditation and yoga. While I am horrible at making myself do either on a daily basis, I do force myself when I become too stressed and my gratitude waivers. I don't do either of these to erase my mind, I do them to allow my mind to work through thoughts without my constant analyzing. By focusing on my breathing, my posture, and whatever position I am doing in the moment; it allows my analytical mind to do it's thing without the interference of my emotions, and the "what-if" scenarios. If I go too long between meditations or yoga, I become a flustered, scattered, ball of emotional turmoil. Just as important, sometimes moreso, is my time spent grounding. Even though it's Winter and freezing, I am anxiously awaiting the warmer temps to go outside, take off my shoes and socks, and walk in the grass. As Spring warms, and my gardens get worked, I will be walking barefoot through freshly worked soil, and putting my hands on Mother Earth every day possible.

We, as humans, have forgotten how important grounding our vibrational energy truly is. We walk around in rubber soled shoes, all day, everyday. Anyone who has any knowledge of how energy works, knows that rubber is a conductor. This breaks the circuit of moving energy. By grounding, you allow energy to flow naturally from your body back into the soil. It's like an energy wash if you will. By taking the time to ground, take time to take in a few deep breaths, allow your negative energy to recycle into the earth, while fresh positive energy is cycled back into your body.

Today, I am reminding myself of everything I have to be grateful for. I have a ton of unresolved issues that I can't seem to find solutions for. Without having anyone neutral enough to discuss ideas with, I take the issues on myself. That keeps me in a constant state of upheaval. Finding that resentful, hurt, angry and disbelieving emotions; requires me to find not only a way work through them but also a way to not misplace those emotions on people that had nothing to do with them. Now, it has also become an issue of determining how to deal with the emotions as well as the issues. While I am not certain of the true effects of them, I was gifted a very beautiful Hematite necklace. Hematite is a stone/crystal, that is supposed to help with mental clarity. While I'm not certain of the effects of it or just an reflected focus, I have valued this necklace. Since having this necklace, anytime my mind feels cluttered and ready to burst, I reach up and hold on to the stone for a few minutes. It reminds to stop, breath and slow down. It is a reminder that I need to shift my focus from concentrating on issues to quieting my mind and allowing it to naturally find solutions.

This is a time of focusing on blessings, for me. I have too many irons in the fire, and not enough solutions to put out that fire. I am finding that my attitude shift is not pleasant and is not doing any favors for my life, as a whole. My mind has been clouded by issues, emotions, and unwanted negative energy, some issues are years in the making. Years of keeping emotions, thoughts, and opinions to myself. Years of just bowing my head, going with the flow because it was easier than not, and other issues that are fairly new...and I just can't understand so I can't deal with them. This is why, I am feeling so restless, and unsettled. I need some time outdoors, without freezing. I need some time alone to ground, and return to source. I need the weather to warm enough that I can do what I need to, to allow my spirit to regenerate.

As I am returning to my gratitude lists, I wish each of you your own means of regenerating your soul and spirit. My way will not work for everyone, but there is a million ways and surely each of you can find one that works. I know this is such a upended time for many. Just because some of your issues many not be life or death, it does not negate their importance to you. Don't allow them to be minimized if they are important to you. Find a way to regenerate. Make a list of your blessings, or write in a journal. Whatever will help you to work through your issues, and hopefully find a way to resolve them that will work for you.

I am grateful for each of you that takes your time, to read these blogs. Many have emailed and your encouragement means the world to me. If I can help even with a knowledge that you are not alone, or something I write helps you find a little peace; I will be happy!

In gratitude,
Salli