Coffee Chat

 

An early morning coffee chat, on this Memorial Day. May we never forget all those that fought and died to preserve and protect our freedom. 

This morning, I want to chat. I have so many conversations I want to have. I believe I will start with the topic of finding your tribe. I have heard about this subject since I was a child, except that it was considered to be "clicks" when I was young. I was really never in one of those growing up. I always stayed outside that circle...not really by choice, but I never thought like most of the people I was around. Even as I got older, I have not really stuck with any one person, for the most part, through the years. I have some great and close friends, don't get me wrong. However, I have always felt like an outsider. I still don't think like most, I still have my own beliefs, my own views and I tend to stand by those...even if I have to stand alone. Finding people with the same mindset is a bonus. That does not mean that you will agree on everything, it just means that your thoughts lean similar on most things. Finding people that have a common interest, common direction, or common thought; can be difficult in today's world. Everything is done online, through email, through text or some form of electronic communication. Our current world has removed the ability to have civilized conversations, in a face-to-face manner. The "conversations" now, have lost so much. You are not able to make eye contact, read body language, or even hear the tone of voice being used. Instead we have bickering online, over many of the thoughts that are not different...but are presented as different, when communications break down due to the lost context or emotion. If you can find people that you can relate to, that is your tribe...even if you don't agree on everything. 

I have said many times, how blessed I have been to learn from some incredible women...and men. Whether this has been grandparents, great grandparents, or elders that are not even related; the knowledge and wisdom of our older generations is beyond valuable. Many of them remember the harder times, the lessons they were taught from generations that grew up during the great depression, living a rural/farm life. Looking back, I had a lot of lessons I could have learned from Grandparents and Great-Grandparents. While I don't remember a lot from my Great-Grandparents, I do have things that have stuck with me. I can remember a Great-Grandmother that was blind and raised 7 children that way. In her older years, she spoke and sang a lot of German. This Great Grandmother's daughter, was one that was a strong willed lady! She would always say that she grew up poor with no money, so she believed in keeping a "rainy day stash." We always teased it was her fun money, although I don't remember her ever spending much of it. She was a boisterous woman and most definitely the strength in my Grandparents relationship. I learned a lot from that Grandpa too. Being a Grandpa's girl...I followed him around like a puppy on a string. I learned carpentry skills, and so much from him.  The Great Grandparents I can remember on an another side, were more of the farm side of my family. These 2 were interesting characters. I can remember this great-grandmother as more subdued and my great-grandfather as the character. He was a tall man, that I remember. I remember going to one of their houses, and watching him work his garden. He was, I'm sure, giving lessons as he teased and would boldly voice his thoughts. My Grandmother, their daughter, was a strong woman! I don't think there was anything that woman couldn't do. She raised 9 kids, my dad being the oldest. There are so many days I wish she was still here to visit with. My life style now, I think would make her proud. I can remember her and many of the things she told/taught me, but it is becoming more difficult as the years pass. This set of Grandparents, I didn't get to spend near as much time with, since they lived further away. This Grandfather, was more of the quiet type too. He had a more quiet wisdom and dry sense sense of humor. I was lucky enough to get to know my husband's great-grandparents, as well. At least 3 of them. They were all very unique. One was very bold. She was very blunt and a no-nonsense type of person. She would tell it like it was, and didn't care what anyone else thought. The other set was more subdued by the time I met them. They were quieter and more observant. His Grandparents, were another interesting mix, and have taught me most of my farm life knowledge. I was not able to meet one of them, as he passed many years before I came into the family. But that Grandmother, wow! She was a force to be reckoned with! She had lost her husband years before, but continued to farm, garden, and live that life until nearly a decade ago. She was such an amazing woman. We didn't see eye to eye on everything, but I would listen to her wisdom, because she was one smart cookie! She taught me tricks for gardening, canning, food preservation, and some lessons that I will never forget. His other set of Grandparents, were just as influential. His Grandfather spent a lot time telling me stories about the hardships they faced, the store that they owned, and he would give me static for being a "city girl" but it was all in fun. I truly admired him. His Grandmother, was also a great source for knowledge. I would listen to her stories as we cut piles of corn that would be divided between several households. Raising kids, working hard, keeping the men in line; it's incredible how much you can learn just by listening. My husband and I come from a long line of strong and determined families. Never victims, but hell bent to do our best, help those in need, and do so with as much humor as possible...all the while learning as we went.

While it seems that generally, society wants to focus on everyone being victims of something...that was not the ways of our previous generations. Our Grandparents and Great-Grandparents, took their adversity and used it to grow, and become better. They didn't use it as an excuse to become unproductive members of society. It frustrates me to see so many that focus on whatever crutch they use for an excuse. We have been truly blessed in this country. We have not had to face the hardship of the World Wars or the Great Depression, until recently. It reminds me of the phrase, "hard times create strong me, east times create weak men." This has become the case, in my eyes. We have it relatively easy, so society has become weak...mind, body and spirit. So many of our earlier generations were taught strength, service to country, and spirituality. They knew the value of hard work, caring for their family, taking care of a home, and defending and taking pride in their country, and had a relationship with their God. They were strong men and women, in every sense of the word. These were the people that were recycling long before it became a political statement. They did it out of necessity and frugality. They didn't have much extra money, so they used items until they were no longer usable. They didn't believe in disposable relationships, or items. You worked hard on everything. Sadly, these values and morals, began disappearing throughout the generations since...and now, it's the worst I have ever seen. We have become a society so weak in every area of importance, that the few that still have these values are consider weird or antique. 

A little history, World War 1(1914-1918), The Great Depression(1929-1939), and World War !!(1939-1945); taught in schools, has become a major topic again as of late. Our country has forgotten not only self-sufficiency, but also the Golden Rule. We have too many generations removed from self care, productions, and taking pride in not only your work but also your country. Growing up, my generation had: the Challenger explosion, Operation Dessert Storm, the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq. While these were devastating for many, it was not comparable to the World Wars or the Great Depression. We were able to really avoid a large part of dealing with these things unless you had a soldier family member. The Baby Boomer generation, had Vietnam, Korea, Beirut, and Woodstock. It was the "in" thing to protest the wars and treat our soldiers with complete disrespect. Instead, they brought the rise of drugs, sexual disease, and divorce. Now, we have the younger generations, truly divided. Some are finally starting to see the need to return to stability, while others are still feeding the divisions and living a life that is disposable. I'd say the generations are truly at the opposite ends of the spectrum, but I think there is more to it. Over the past 100 years, there has been some kind of divide and conquer campaign, it feels like. It has become more and more of, "Us vs. Them." Typically, at least in the past, this was more of people vs. government. It's now been turned on dividing the people. The phrase, "United we stand, divided we fall," is very much at play. When the people are divided by gender, race, religion, sexual preference, or even political party, it's easier for the government to control. It's easier for them to take away the very rights and liberties that so many have fought and died to defend. The one that has always stuck with me, WE ALL BLEED RED! We were all created by the same person - no matter what name you give him(God, Creator, Source, Universe, etc.) 

I have spent, what feels like forever, preaching about being self-sufficient. My own journey in this has been quite a roller coaster. I grew up with my Dad gardening every year. I didn't really understand it or know much about it. As I said, I grew up in a time when things were more disposable. We were poor, but had a microwave, we had an Atari, and a VCR. I didn't know or understand, at the time, what poor meant. I just knew that some kids had more than we did, while others had less. We taught to treat everyone with respect, no matter who they were. It wasn't until I moved to Missouri, and was dating a "farm boy," that I really began to understand any of it. Even then, it took me nearly 8 years of marriage, a roller coaster of ups and downs with that, learning to live on a single income while raising a baby, and living in the middle of nowhere, before it all started sinking in. I wish I would have been taught, or retained the early lessons learned, even more! After spending nearly 10 years now, working on this self-sufficient life style...basically going back to our roots, I want to teach everyone that will listen. Especially now, when our world seems to have lost its collective sanity. It seems that so many in this point of time, are being shoved into being more frugal, more self-sufficient and less dependent. 

I'm going to end this coffee chat for now. I want to encourage everyone to slow down, reconnect with your spirituality, stop allowing yourself to be victimized, start taking responsibility, and start demanding that our civil servants work for us again. All Life Is Precious! Find your calling, and chase it. Do everything within your power to start learning how to be self-sufficient. Stop depending on a defunct government, they are the problem not the answer. Remember, above all, we were ALL created equal in the eyes of our creator, there are no exceptions to this. 

 

God Bless!