Mid-afternoon sweet tea...no coffee, too hot!

 

Here we are just 2 days from the end of July. It's a little after 4 pm, and 100 degrees. I thought a coffee chat would be a good thing...except it's too danged hot for coffee...so a glass of cold sweet tea it is. 

I have lots to talk about. I really don't like politics, although I do keep up with it all, as much as possible. Even though I don't like it, politics effects every single one of us, whether we like it or not. While it is really easy to get wrapped up entirely with the federal elections...we all know that circus. It is just as important to know what is going on in your state and local elections, as well. 2024 in Missouri is a big election year. Not just federally, but a large portion of our state politicians are also vying for new positions. I have dug in to research the options for our governor, lt. governor, secretary of state, attorney general, treasurer, state house and senate races, as well as, the local county wide races being held. That is a challenge in Missouri, at least to me. In my county, there just isn't much talk, outside the main town in our county. So many of us living rural, unless we are willing to get involved in the rat race, don't hear much. We never have ANY visits from those running for our state offices in our area. I guess they have forgotten Northeast Missouri goes clear to the Iowa line, which is much further north than Hannibal and Canton. Once in a great while, we will get a phone call for a tele-townhall meeting with our federal house representative. It's really upsetting that some of these people want votes, but can't bother to know the people they represent. I may work on a blog specifically for our Missouri election. Our primary is August 6th.

Aside from my most important job, being a mom, is my work with veterans. My Dad, and both my Grandad's served in our great military. Without even realizing it, I have spent my life surrounding myself with these great veterans. I have so many friends that served, and have met hundreds of incredible veterans through my years. Veterans are a very unique group of people. While each one has been their own person, the characteristics and the means in which they carry themselves, make them stand out. The past 7 or so years, I have been honored to not only meets hundreds of these amazing people; but to also get to know so many that have overcome or battle daily through wounds - both visible and invisible. Having gotten to share one-on-one conversations, hear their stories, share in their tears, be the ear they may need at the moment; has changed who I am. I am not a licensed counselor, or a therapist...but someone who genuinely cares and is willing to listen. Sometimes, that is all that is needed. You see, being the person I am, when I started being involved with veterans that had everything from PTSD, to TBI's, to amputations, and so much in between, I began researching.  I wanted to attempt to understand how I could be of help or use. At the time, I was volunteering with a group that had a lot of focus on helping veterans by getting them outdoors. Within just a few events, I realized the outdoors played a large part in helping the veterans, but also being able to intuitively be available to veterans that needed to talk. Most of the time, the veterans were enjoying themselves and the outdoors. However, a few needed to talk through whatever was on their minds. I can come up with 3 veterans from all those years ago, that have stuck in my memory. One was pretty reserved, had a service dog to help with anxiety, and had been in combat. He was soft spoken and it was hard to picture him as anything but that. Over a few days, I think we spoke about an hour, but that was what he needed. Another veteran, was quite a charming man. He walked with a limp, and was happy to share about his service and life, and family. The last time I spoke with him, he had just gotten engaged. The third veteran, what can I say...he was something else. He was in a wheelchair, but he seemed the life of every gathering. He and his wife are amazing people. I am happy to call them friends, to this day. Each month for the past 6 years, mostly, I attend a veterans coffee. This morning gathering of veterans, is informational for the veterans and most of those that attend have become friends. When some things changed for me, I feared I would not be able to carry on with veteran hunt that had begun in 2019 at our farm. Covid proved to me that the world was going to get rocky. By 2021, I knew taking a different path was my only option. If I was going to continue to help in the one way I knew to help, I had to do something drastic and ventured out on my own. I had the intention to take a year off to regroup, but those amazing veteran's that I have grown so close to...weren't going to have any part of that. Many of them stepped up, to make sure we could make the 2021 event happen. I was not in the emotional state to do it myself. Since then, it has been a LOT of work, and I've had to depend on some good friends and my family for help; but 2024 will be my 4th year of this event - alone(the 6th event at our farm), and the biggest veteran event we have ever had at our farm. For 4 years, we had a veteran group that offered their partnership to cover some of the expense, True Impact Outdoors. I work hard to get donations, sponsorships, and volunteers to make sure each of our veterans has a top of the line experience. We offer an annual raffle, and 100% of that money goes back into this event, as does all donations. I have some great people that help me cover a wider area, and they help with the event itself. Again, without these people, I don't believe I could make it work. This year, we have 9 veterans coming from 5 different states. How incredible is that?! These men and women are amazing!! 

I have made some incredible connections through the last 10 years; through veterans, to Senators in some states, to some incredible individuals. I have overcome my own fears of public speaking, to not feeling adequate enough to do what I'm doing. I learned to have to step out of my own comfort zone to begin moving in a better direction. I had to learn to that some people are just meant to be in your life for a season. I've had to let go of people that have passed on, while never letting their memory fade. My own struggles, I have dealt with on my own. If there is one major lesson I have learned from all the veterans I have gotten to know...is that we have to count our blessings. 

As I finish up for today, so I can feed my family...I want to end with this prayer.

Lord, we thank you, for every blessing and every lesson in our lives. We are imperfect people, yet your love is unwavering for those that come to you. We may not know how to pray or what to pray, but you know our hearts. In your word, you use imperfect people to your plan. I pray that everyone reading this will come to you, get to know you and accept you as their God. I pray that watch over your people and provide them safety, good health, purpose and guidance. I pray that those pushing the evil and division, be enlightened. I pray that wrap your arms around the shoulders of your people, protect and if necessary put your hand over their mouth. Bless the amazing people that work so hard for the good of humanity. I humbly ask that you protect America, her people and the good people of this world. Amen.

Coffee Chat and Always More

 

I have attempted to write a new coffee chat for over a week now. I have really struggled with the manner, in which, to put thoughts to words. It's easier for me to just spit out my thoughts, in whatever means they come to mind. However, I have spent a LOT of years controlling myself and attempting diplomatic discussions...to avoid losing control of my tongue and temper. That juggling act is getting very old. Diplomacy only works when people are: a.)willing to open their minds to differing thoughts, b.)willing to shut their mouths to actually hear what is being said, or c.)are willing to brutally honest. When lies, deception, and gaslighting is the main "go-to" for much of society...it is difficult to find open minds and closed mouths. 

I have gotten a lot of grief for telling people to do their own research. I get it, everyone is busy. I guess, that means, I am not...so the research I have taken the time to do, means nothing. Although, those that truly know me, NOW, know that I will not say or argue about anything, that I don't know anything about. There are a lot that claim to know me, but don't know that about me...meaning they are not a regular part of my life in the past 10 years or more. Shoot, the more I learn, changes me on a regular basis. It was very difficult to accept how much I thought I knew, and yet didn't have clue...until I learned or relearned it. The phrase, "you don't know, what you don't know," is one of the most accurate. There is also one, "it's easier to be manipulated that to admit you have been manipulated." 

I believe diplomacy is going to win out this morning. Economically, the statistics are troubling. 86% of American's are living paycheck-to-paycheck, 72% of American's do not have $500 in savings, and 46% of American's ages 18-26 depend on the financial help of family or friends to survive. I do not care what political party is supposedly in control, you couple those stats with a nearly $35 trillion debt($267,000 PER TAX PAYER); that is unsustainable. Yet, our elected body continues to hand out or funnel money, all over the world. Our once strong dollar, is only worth around 3 cents now. How does that happen, when our taxes continue to rise, our elected body continues to be not only paid, but have increased incentives/pay? While some will argue, the fact is, when you put today's numbers, incomes, debts, services and housing; in a comparison with our history...we are in a depression. We blew right past a recession 2-3 years ago. Not being sarcastic, BUT the great depression did not only exist in 1929. It began around 1927 and lasted until the second world war. Our elected body, throughout decades, has robbed from social security and medicare funds, with it being estimated to be broke by 2029. Those funds were forcibly taken from every single tax payer, you were not given the option to opt-out of that...even though the elected body did. You, the hard working tax payer, was NOT given a choice. I know my generation, will be met with a bankrupt social security system, that we have been forced to pay into. Just as was done with social security, the healthcare act was the same scenario. It forced people into purchasing something, even if they didn't want it, or be penalized; but how has that worked out for the healthcare industry?! Less medical staff, longer waiting periods to visit with doctors, more red tape, more desk jockies deciding what is medically necessary than the doctors themselves, more American's forced to spend money on a program they may never use, let alone breaking states sovereignty and American's freedom to decide what they buy. These are facts, you can easily look them up for yourself. You can go to your chosen search engine, and watch the US debt clock, it will show you most of the American financial turmoil. 

Anyway, I'm going to move on. This year, has been a struggle. Let's start with the small stuff. Realizing that so much of our stuff is really old, and is starting to break down or fall apart...in a time of prices being completely stupid, has been tough. I needed to replace my sofa, it was not only broke down but literally falling apart. I had watched since late last year trying to find sales on new ones, or even decent used ones that were reasonably priced. I didn't find either! That is until yesterday. I found a decent used one, coming from someone we knew, and there wasn't a concern of bringing in bugs. I really dislike used furniture, but last new sofa I bought last only a few years before it was junk. The price was right. It wasn't exactly what I wanted, but it's in great shape. Prior to that, was my mower. As much as I wish I could say, we utilize every available area to grow useful produce...we have a large yard. Problems, costly repairs, missing parts, and adding oil to mow each time...wasn't feasible. So, there was another unexpected expense. Managing my own illnesses and recovery has been a full-time job! The past few years, my health has taken a big hit. From pneumonia to big weight loss(that I didn't have to lose), to the late stage of peri-menopause and all that goes with that, to trying to regain the lost weight...it's been a major challenge. I have always fought with my weight. When I get stressed, I lose weight quick. Then it's a fight to gain it back. The last round of illness took me down to 83 pounds, after another bout with pneumonia. I'm still fighting to break 100 again. Once you are that sick, your stomach shrinks to match the amount of food you ingest, making it difficult to eat more. So, you have to slowly eat more, and increase your stomach capacity to allow for weight gain. So, for me, having to make myself eat more often, means I'm having to stop projects to eat...which means there are a lot of unfinished projects, a lot of clutter from unfinished projects, and a lot of disorganization that stresses me out, all over again. I refuse to quit, so I just keep fighting and will accomplish each of my goals...eventually!

With the health and economic issues facing nearly everyone, we've had several personal areas that have effected us. It's difficult when you are lied to, to realize you are not worth being told the truth. It gives you a really good idea of where you stand. With grief, you go through stages of healing. There are times you have moments of feeling like you blindsided, or smacked before you begin to accept that loss. Then you have an event or events that will slap you in the face, and you have to start the grief process all over again. It's hard, but at some point, you have to conscientiously step off that carnival ride. I struggle with repeat patterns, and obvious disdain. Anyway, we found ourselves in a situation that now requires a new direction. Now, we have to consider options we never thought we'd have to. That grieving we thought we had learned to accept, has been slapped backward to hurt once again. We'll deal with it, we always do. 

History is such a remarkable thing. As I began diving into the history of the area we live, a few years ago, it's been amazing to learn about. We live in an area referred to as the laplands. It's where 2 states meet, and in my area...have battled over the land for a hundred years. Enough so, we actually had an Iowa address for a lot of years, before now having a Missouri address. It has been changed back and forth, through the years based partly on the course of a river. Learning how our property history has evolved has been interesting too. It's truly incredible when you go through legal documents, when you have to visit 2 separate states to get information on a single piece of land, or even a larger mass of land! Visiting with local Historians has been educational. Learning about our entire county being stolen from other surrounding counties and states, is unbelievable! I am on hold for now with history research, but I am looking forward to diving deeper and further back. 

I took some needed quiet time this morning to write, and just exist. I have a lot to do, but I needed to quiet my thoughts some. After a busy few days of running, I am happy to be home and not have any real pressing errands to manage. That will kick off again tomorrow, but I do what I can, when I can...and that has to be enough for now. Taking time to slow down, to enjoy time with my family, to work in the yard/gardens, and just exist is necessary...I'm just a little slow on the uptake sometimes to remember this...until I'm forced to. So, it's time to get something accomplished. I hope you all count your blessings and remember: treat people kindly, you don't know what is happening in their lives, and everyone has a part of their life that is messy. There is only one being that sits high enough to judge anyone, and it's no one on this Earth!

Coffee Chat

 

 

There is so much I want to talk about, but as usual, I will limit the conversation. As much as some believe otherwise, I do not say most of what I think. So, hang on and let's get this ride started.

I think and feel very deeply, it's a blessing and a curse. I am always trying to balance perception with an under lying reason...meaning: when there is a problem or say, a lie that is presented; I try to find reason or justification. There are plenty of individuals that believe they are smarter than they are, and if that works for them...more power to them. However, as someone that dives into research and questions everything...rarely, do I find anyone that has an IQ higher than average. Not trying to be mean, just honest. I myself am just average...I just prefer to accept I don't a lot about anything, but enough to be dangerous to those that live among the masses. Those that get higher degrees than mine, like to believe they are smarter...and usually they fall into the "educated idiot" category, at least to me. Honestly, I do not try to be mean, but know-it-all people, irritate me. None of us sit high enough to truly judge others, on anything. 

I rarely argue with people anymore. I state what I see and what I learn, and find those that attempt to argue...are the ones that refuse to educate themselves further than the noise box. That's ok. That is their choice. This is true for more than just the chaos in the world. It is inclusive to situations also. I have seen so many situations that could have better outcomes, with a true effort, but it's easier to play a blame game. Whether it's finances, health, job, or relationships...it takes effort, acquiring necessary education, taking better care of yourself; ultimately making it your decision to do better, in spite or despite, of a prevailing problem. God knows, I fight this on a daily basis. I believe each of us has a past, that has influenced us...both good and bad. I learned many years ago, blaming someone else for my own ineptitude, would never get me where I wanted to be. It can be challenging to not fall back into a negative mindset, that I battled decades ago. Especially with the way the world and people are today. I do have down days, but they don't last long. I do a lot of "considering the source," and move on. It would be easy to say, "I've always been this way," and use that as an excuse to not better myself; but that is a cop-out. In my eyes, I look at certain situations, look at my own knee-jerk reactions, and then assess what would be my typical reaction...and then I look deeper. The hardest part, is accepting changes. Even the most minute changes, can be rattling, if you are content to stay locked into a pattern. I am a firm believer in not burning a bridge you may need later...however, sometimes those bridges get burned by others, and there is nothing you can do about it. You have to deal with the grieving process but ultimately, you have to move forward...otherwise, you open the door to repeat bad decisions. 

One more tough subject before I move on. Our country is a mess. I know many would argue here, just save it. When every $1 is now actually work 2-3 cents, real estate is at an all time high, layoffs are piling up, war is threatened with multiple countries, our own citizens are struggling to just feed their families; we have a big ole mess. The longer this can gets kicked down the road, the worse it is going to be. Let's just talk about the jobs reports. Every month for nearly 3 years now, the job reports have shown increased job openings. Then just a few weeks later, the government comes out with a revision(quietly released, so many don't pay attention to it), and it is a third of the original numbers. Not to mention the types of job openings...hospitality and government always lead the way. The majority of those jobs are less than 34 hours per week, with no benefits. Could your household survive on a 34 hour per week, paycheck? I don't know many that could. What if that 34 hour work week had to include health insurance too? Do you understand that those types of jobs, end up putting more people on food stamps...that tax payers support? So, those working full time are on the hook to pay more and more into taxes, to support those who can only get a part-time job. Many of those full time tax payers, can barely make ends meet for their own family, let alone paying more for taxes. Let's not forget the increased costs of property taxes, fuel, food, vehicle insurance, utilities, and durable goods. Have you tried to buy a decent pair of boots/shoes lately? I'm not talking the $40 ones that look cute...I'm talking the shoes people have to wear for their jobs outside of an office. I can tell you a decent pair of work boots, that will last at most, 6 months...is now running around $175-$225. Nearly double what they were 5 years ago. There is such a massive divide in what people think they need versus what they want versus what they actually need. We have a society that has become obsessed with instant gratification, they are willing to debt slaves. Too many, for too long, have bought into theory of having a bunch of stuff, even though they owe on everything, gives them a status boost. I was guilty of this for several years. This whole "being rich on paper," thing is a lie! If you don't own it, debt free...you are not rich, period. You are a slave. The taxes we are forced to pay, that are continually increasing, make us all slaves. Why are forced to continue paying tax on items we purchased, year after year...and if you don't continue paying, you lose whatever assets you bought and paid taxes on to begin with? If you think about that, you should be mad! We pay taxes on income, food, fuel, property, real estate, roads, schools, clothing, shoes - literally everything we buy. Then you are forced to continue to pay taxes annually for homes, vehicles, ATV/UTV's, livestock, and this does not even include any improvements to the exterior of your home - even buildings. All of this being said, while our government is running nearly $35 trillion in debt - that is being held by other countries! It's disturbing to me, how many people just shrug their shoulders or say, "there's nothing I can do about it." Really? Up to this point, we have elections. So many people get wrapped up in who is going to spend 4-8 years at the white house, they have completely forgotten how our government is supposed to work. Meaning, those we put into Congress, Senate, our State politics, even local positions - THOSE are the ones we should be after to actually serve their job. Our government is only allowed to serve by our consent, and by just going along, we are giving our consent. We need to be putting term limits on congress and senate, just as they did for the president...for the exact same reason! 

While their are millions of American citizens struggling with food insecurity right now, and so many are our veterans, why are we sending money to any other nation?! Do you know, of all 336 million people in America, only 1% have served this country through the military? ONE PERCENT!!! It's no wonder we have reached the level mental illness in this country that has sane people scratching their heads! Our soldiers/veterans are trained for combat, they are run through the gauntlets to be fighting machines. Their brotherhood is not discriminate.  For decades, they have been sent into battle grounds, seen horrors that most of us can not begin to image; only to be brought home and dumped into a thankless and entitled society. I can not even begin to fully understand, but hearing stories of the struggles some of our bravest have endured, is heart wrenching! Hearing the struggles with trying to get medical help, mental health care; leaves me pissed off. While the wars in many memories, have fewer veterans remaining...there are still a LOT of veterans, from many wars suffering! Many of the WW2 vets are now gone, there's Korea, Vietnam, Beirut, Bosnia, Desert Storm, Desert Shield, and everything since 9/11. Illnesses and injuries from PTSD, TBI, survivors guilt, loss of limbs, Agent Orange, the fire pits. These soldi3ers, were willing to fight for US...the American people and our Constitution, and given their orders from our government. There is not a single soldier that should ever have to go without healthcare, food, medications, housing; PERIOD! 

I believe in helping when I am able. What I don't believe in, is helping to make yourself look good. Meaning, I do things without a camera, without even mentioning doing things. Whether it be helping someone in need with a food box, giving an anonymous donation to a food pantry, paying for someone's groceries at a store, or whatever. I don't need to broadcast what I do, because those that need to know...know; God, myself and those involved. I will help those that need a hand up, if possible, but I will not enable someone on a repeat pattern of not trying to help themselves. That type of situation, you are helping...you are enabling. I encourage people to do random acts of kindness, because I believe it makes the world a better place, but also because it makes people better. In a world full of negativity, it's little things, done repeatedly to be a better society, that will make a difference. 

I believe I will stop here for today. It is difficult to work on ourselves, and not to become defensive when we feel like we are being called out. Before we jump into any issue, we need to take a step back. We need to remember the importance of kindness, grace and freedom of speech. We may not like what someone else is saying or doing, but it does not mean we need to jump into some form argument or disagreement. Sometimes, it's best to just move on, scroll past or ignore.