Coffee Chat

 

Coffee Chat

I have spent 2 weeks trying to find the umph to write. I have a lot to say, but finding it more and more difficult to do so without the generalizations of anonymity.  I keep my conversations general for a purpose, but it's difficult to explain situations without disclosing relationships, sources and so forth. So, I withdraw and don't say much. With the situations world wide, and a lot closer to home, as well, I could write several books! In the meantime, I will do my best to write today. 

My mind moves a million miles an hour, ALL THE TIME! Even when I'm attempting to rest, my brain is moving. I have found myself in a such a strange place. Working towards my goals is just part of who I am, but the position I find myself in now, is one of moving forward. Putting so many areas of issue and tension to rest, permanently.  I've found myself turning off emotions, and listening to facts. Turning off the pity or trying to understand issues and instead focusing on manifesting my life to be exactly what I want. I find myself in such a unique frame of mind that seems foreign. I have always thought deeply and felt deeply, about everything. While I don't ever see that going away, it has shifted. It has shifted to I do what I can, when I can; but I am not responsible for fixing everyone else's problems. I am not responsible for their poor choices, poor decisions, or any part of anyone else's life. I am naturally a fixer by nature, but I can't and won't drop my own barriers anymore. It's quite odd to feel so at ease with something that seems and feels so odd. Maybe it's yet another "unhealthy coping mechanism," but if it is...it makes me feel freer than I can ever remember feeling. I suppose it goes along with my constant use of the phrase lately, "not my circus, not my monkeys." 

I'm moving forward, and as much as I love to dance, hopefully...I won't have too many cha-cha's to deal with. Moving forward includes focusing more on where I want to go in life, what I want to accomplish, and how much I am willing to learn. I promise you, we are NOT trees, forced to stay in one location, with the "same ole, same ole," mindset. To achieve goals, you have to be willing to step outside your comfort zone. It's terrifying, it's exhilarating, and it's necessary! It's really easy to get drug back into old habits and old ways, especially if you are trying to make strides to move forward. Our comfort zones, are just that, comfortable. We know what to expect, we know the limits, and who is going to be within those zones. Jumping outside that proverbial box, is a giant leap of faith! Ready or not, I'm taking a leap of faith. 

As many know, that have followed my blogs, I love to write. Writing is my release, it's my contribution to anything I think may be of value to someone else, and sometimes...it's nothing more than a public journal for the chaos that goes through my head. This year, I am taking my writing up a notch, I'm taking my photography up a notch, and I'm taking me up a notch. You may have noticed several different blog names over the past months. I've been playing with titles, and watching numbers. It seems more people are reading these all time. I will do individual blogs, but I'm taking on specified blogs as well. You all know my coffee chats, they are typically all over the place like regular conversations. Let's Talk blogs, are more topic centered, Coffee Breaks are shorter chats more geared toward a brief conversation. Salli's Soap Box is more political and worldwide conversations. I'm working towards my own state news, politics, business on a yet to be named blog. Farm Chat is all about small family farming, and homesteading. Veteran Chat is mostly for my local veteran communities, but will include information nationally, as I get it verified. I will also be starting a new blog, again yet unnamed, for my photography and special projects. I look forward to bringing you all along on my journey. It's about living your best life, every single day. 

As much as I am always trying to understand the motives of others, it can be totally overwhelming. The psychology that it takes to even grasp the behaviors of others, is draining. Can you imagine being around people that are constantly negative, constantly living in the past, constantly dwelling on sick/tired/broke, constantly spewing negative responses to every possible topic? It is emotionally draining, and in turn...it drains you physically as well. When you work with natural health/holistic health; you work with mind, body AND spirit. You can not heal yourself when one of those areas is out of balance. Life is neither good nor bad. Life is life....it is how you deal with or handle life, that is determining outcome. In turn, those you surround yourself with, will determine how you view life. Have you ever noticed those that are always happy, or "lucky" or seem to have everything together? They aren't the ones that dwell in the past, they aren't the ones that focus on the road bumps in life, they are the ones that focus on the negative. The acknowledge when things are difficult, but they don't take up residency there. They are just like, "yeah, that happened. So, I'll learn from it and go on." You won't hear them focus on other people, you won't hear them reliving the past, you don't hear them spreading rumors or having mindless conversations. Their focus:  WHAT CAN I DO, TO DO BETTER?! They focus on ideas, growth and improvement instead of pity, "whoa is me," and how bad life is. It's quite the stark difference. You have to learn to pay attention to your own energy/intuition. Those that bring down your energy levels, I call them energy vampires, are not the ones to spend your time with. You want to be around people that raise your vibrations, that resonate with where you want to go. You want people that are not "Debbie downers." It's one thing to acknowledge and recognize thoughts/feelings/emotions and even when you just feel like crap...it's a whole other area when you just camp out with all that and get bogged down in a quicksand of negativity. 

Having spent a lot of time studying psychology and natural health, I learned that we can be our own worst enemies. When we are constantly subjected to the crap on television and in movies, we surround ourselves with people that are less than high quality, when we focus on negativity or lack...we are manifesting, in our own lives, exactly that. It's incredible how much we have not been taught about our own bodies, mind and spirit. Our bodies, with the right nutrition are capable of healing. Our constant thoughts are able to manifest whatever we focus on, and we only use - at most - 10% of our mental capacities. It's really sad. Humans are such a remarkable species, and too many have been dumbed down to know or even realize. Sadly, this has been happening for generations, but you have to WANT to break cycles. Breaking cycles is a lot of work! It's recognizing that you don't want to stay in whatever negative energy you are in, and instead want to do and be better! It's a constant desire to learn, grow, better yourself, and progress! It's dumping those negative nellies, it's letting go of the classification of labels by everyone, it's retraining your mind to let go of everything that no longer serves to better you. No matter who or what that may be. It's saying, yes, I can be cordial but that is as far into my world as you are allowed. It's dumping bad habits that have held you hostage. It's not easy, I can promise you this from experience! Too many times you can get drug back into drama and negativity, but you have to learn to shut it down. Even if it means letting those calls go to voicemail, learning to say no, learning to say enough is enough - you are no longer allowed to be in my inner circle. Those that are achieving their goals, aren't doing so for attention or recognition. They are doing so for themselves! No one else! 

I have reached the stage of life, considered mid-life. I'm now closer to 50 than I am to 40. I have reached the stage of pre-menopause, the stage of my children being old enough to tend to themselves and not needed as much. That stage of "empty nest" without the empty nest. A time when I am having to rediscover myself, my wants/needs, my relationships and the path from here forward. You don't realize how all-involved raising children is, until now. Many relationships struggle and become nonexistent during times of raising children. It really doesn't matter which relationships; spouses, friends and even extended family. Life moves so fast that we don't slow down enough to enjoy the moment, we are constantly looking forward and not realizing life is passing us by. We focus on so many things, but we neglect to realize that one day; everything will change. We have been programed to look forward. Whether that be; waiting on Friday, a holiday, waiting until we have enough money, enough time, whatever....we neglect to enjoy the moment. We don't give ourselves time to just be, not overscheduling ourselves or our children. We wear the badge of being busy continuously, but never seem to accomplish what we want. We have gotten to a point of an upside down world.  We value things over people. We take for granted those we care about, and place emphasis on those that aren't that important. Yes, we have to have an income to live, but that job....they would replace you before your body was even in the ground. Those corporations that put income over their customers and employees are not the ones we should be utilizing. In all our busyness, what goals are we accomplishing? Are we truly better ourselves and our communities, or are we simply keeping up with the Jones's? 

Do you have goals or is it simply a wish list? A goal is written down with a projected time frame. A goal is worked towards, even if it's in baby steps. A goal is something that can better us, as people. Whether those goals are to get out of debt, to have a newer home, to learn a new skill/trade, to help your community, or any number of possibilities. Goals are for you. 

I can go on for hours about so many things. I like to talk about ideas, solutions, goals, and productivity. I have spent too much of my life being pulled into quick sand with negative remarks, mindsets and people. Spring 2022 is my time to re-evaluate, reset goals, rewrite my own story, manifest what I want from life, and release negativity. I've had a tough year and a half, and it's time. I have reached that very unique stage of just being done. No anger, no resentment, no sadness, no emotion....just done. I need to refocus, and realign my own balance moving forward. There is no more room in my life for anything that is pulling me into a cycle that goes against my higher self. 

Springing forward 2022. 

Salli