Dancing to the beat.

It's one of those days again. You look in the mirror and wonder who the heck is staring back at you. It's not the physical looks you are looking at though, it's the emptiness in your eyes. It's the hallow feeling you see when you look into the windows of the soul. It's the longing for something more that is drawing you in. It's the sadness of what you once knew to be you.

It's these windows of the soul that have you feeling edgy. You know you can see more in them, but it just seems to evade you every time you look. You know there is more, you can feel it. So where is that light that illuminates the darkness, where is the determination that once rode so think it was untouchable, where is that confidence that once was unbreakable? Where is your beautiful soul? What power have you willingly given to someone else in the name of conforming to be considered socially acceptable? How big of a portion of who you really are, are you willing to give up? How much have you already given?

In a world of judgmental hypocrites, how can you ever be truly who you are if you are constantly being berated, degraded, and labeled; to justify the hypocrisy? If you are not a person to fit into societies image of what is normal or acceptable, you will be labeled, you will be criticized, you will hear your share of negativity. How do you hold on to what you feel to be true, what your feel to be right, and what you believe? Too many times, without really knowing it, you become just one of the crowd. You get tired of fighting for your beliefs, you get tired of constant negativity and tired of the "normal people," using you as a laughing stock.

When too many in society aren't willing to break the mold, it becomes easier to just "go with the flow." It becomes easier to just do what everyone else is doing because they don't draw attention, or they are not strong enough to stand alone and face the "norms." It's easier to let others guide your way. It's easier to just do what everyone else is doing so you don't stand out or draw attention. It's easier to just be in the mix of the normal people so you don't have to actually think for yourself, you don't have to worry about making a decision that could throw you out of the normal realm, you don't have to make time to think through an issue...because all the norms, have "already done the research."

It reminds us of the cartoons, we had as kids. It was always the cat, mouse and dog. They followed the normal stereotypes at the time...mouse eggs the cat on, the cat chases the mouse. The cat runs by the dog, and in turn aggravating the dog, so the dog chases the cat. It's the way society has become today. You have a constant repeat of chasing after what frustrates you, to never really find a finish line. So, you are just constantly running, you're constantly after some frustration, trying to find some imaginary prize for catching the frustration; when in reality, there is no prize, there is no finish line, and the frustration - it's stays just out of reach to keep you chasing it.

When you look in the mirror, the outer appearance will never be as good as it could be until the windows to your soul are shining with your own reality. Your soul has to shine through all the chasing, it has to be blinding to what is not acceptable to you, you have to allow that light to shine on who you are and not what you are expected to be. Do you know the REAL you? Do you know your strengths, weaknesses, passions and desires? Do you know and understand who you really are, without apologies, without fear of the backlash of not fitting into society's "normal?"

If you do, you are a beautiful rarity. You are truly a light to those that are floundering to find their own inner strengths.

Finding a peace within in a world full of chaos seems to be impossible. It is within sight but always seems to be just out of reach. Finding people who are stimulating to you seems to be the route we all need to take. However, finding those that are not only stimulating, but also inspiring, seem to be hard to find.

Finding our own beat, finding our drum, finding our march; doesn't have to be impossible when we are willing to go it alone if necessary. So many times, we follow what our soul guides us to, only to lose focus when all the outside negativity filters in. As we find the beat of soul, and our own realities seem to finally make sense, we are then faced with the outside negativity of those that either don't understand or those who are too ignorant to even try. As soon as someone begins to find their beat again, there is always someone sometimes even multiple people, that are more than happy throw out negative comments, throw out the reminder that you are so different from everyone else, and/or they are lacking the understanding of you as a person they don't realize how hurtful their remarks really are.

For those involved in the lives of the people that are finding their own way, I can only offer a bit of advice. Be supportive, even if you don't understand it. Remember that just because you may not have found your way, does not mean you can be disrespectful to your partner and the paths that work for them. If you are in a relationship, communication is essential when one or both partners are trying to find their beat. You may not always agree, understand or believe in the same paths, but you either have to find a middle ground that works or deal with the alternative of parting ways.

Too many times, as we are finding a beat that works for us, we are hit head on with so much energy, negative and positive - from so many different fronts, that it becomes overwhelming. We are finally dancing to a beat that works for us and find that that beat does not blend with our partner, family or friends. It may mean letting go of a few relationships that are just not going to work, it may mean learning to accept that some relationships - you just won't be able to share your beat with. When finding your beat and accepting your uniqueness, you must be willing to accept and deal with all aspects that may change.

Dancing to the beat of your own drum, is in my opinion, what our purpose in life should be. Finding that spark that sets your soul ablaze with so much purpose and light, that you become a beacon for those like you. Finding what makes you happy, fulfilled and content, is not easy but is more than necessary to truly live. You may go through stages, when your soul wants something different. It happens, and it's natural. We make promises of forever, that seems flawed to me. There is no way of knowing what tomorrow will bring, let alone forever. All we can promise, truthfully, is to love/cherish/honor today.

As each of us venture into our own beat, I encourage you to listen to your soul. Find the fuel that brings your spirit alive. Find your own beat, and do not let anyone persuade you from what really drives you. Give yourself permission to be different, to be individual! You deserve to be happy, content, and completely fulfilled!

Dance to your own beat!
S