A video caught my teenagers attention...

Last night, my 14 year old son came to me with a video that caught his attention. Sometimes, as a Mom, when your teenage child tells you about about something that caught their attention...you cringe! You go through all the possibilities, and in your head you are thinking of some kind of explanation for everything under the sun. We were getting ready to eat supper, so I told him it would have to wait till later. This helped buy my a little more time to contemplate a few more ideas to explain away whatever he had found online.

When supper was over, dishes were done and it was time to sit and relax, he brought out his tablet, and said here Mom, I want you to see this. It didn't surprise me that the person doing the video was a girl, after a minute though, it registered who the girl was. It was Sadie Roberts from the Duck Dynasty family. (He loves the show, by the way!) I didn't catch who it was at first, because she was make up free. She had a powerful message that I was very proud to hear.

As many of my readers know, I am very spiritual but not religious. However, I have taken my children to different churches so they can choose the best form of spirituality for them. So, they know the Bible, they know religious beliefs about God, etc. When my son spoke of how this video touched him, I began thinking.

It's difficult for me to speak and have a deep discussion without gaining some research, so I stumbled through our conversation some, but I told him if it spoke to him then that was what matter. It wasn't until everyone was sleeping, and I had the opportunity to watch the video again, that my mind began to wrap around so much of what the video would really mean to so many, not only young people but possible to some older people that are struggling too. So, here I am writing again with some insightful words of my own.

Knowing my son, I have hoped that as he grew into a young man, he would respect women and men,know what working hard meant, knowing that you have to move beyond outward beauty to find a truly beautiful person, that material things were not what mattered, and that family, above all else was what was important. I am very proud of the young man he is becoming, even though some of the teenage drama still filters into our home.

Here is my thoughts on Sadie's video. I think this young lady has a level head, and has been raised right. Her overall message was to just be you, even through different problems, you can turn to the Bible and prayer to get through whatever you are going through. Finding confidence where you need to, to not only deal with every day challenges but to accept the body you have. Miss Sadie Roberts, you may not be my daughter, but I am proud of the young lady you are. You have found not only an avenue that works for you and have shared your true self with so many but you have inspired so many other young people; my son included.

So many young people today are ambushed with materialism, and consumed by all the things that just don't matter. The one thing she brought up and I have heard locally is "thigh gap." Seriously?! This is a concern for girls now?! Girls, here's a thought...quit worrying about such foolish things when you have so much potential for so much more! Your outside appearance, although you need to take of, is not who you are on the inside. The "thigh gap," makeup, brand of clothing, are all just material and unimportant things that will change with time and age. Being real with yourself and those around you is what will make you stand out from the rest! Being with family, being honest and loyal, being true to your form of spirituality, staying true to you own beliefs....that is what will never fail you. Setting goals for your dreams, getting the best education possible, and becoming strong independent people is what young and old need to work on today; Not just following a crowd of people because of what's "popular," right now. Aside from academics, 95% of all the crap that goes on throughout the years of school-through high school, WILL NOT MATTER, later in life! To tell you from my own experience, most of the "popular kids," I went to school with, did not end up any better off than I did. The majority of them did not go on to be pro-athletes, they did not go win a Nobel Peace Prize, not a one of them is the next Ben Franklin, Ammelia Earheardt, or Albert Einstein. To this day, not a single one of them is President of the United States, and only one has gone on to be in Congress or Senate. Some of those all powerful, "popular people," are working in fast food or retail because they found out the world did not revolve around them!

My message today is to all the young people today. Find out who you really are: loose the make up, loose the attitude troubles and stop bullying others, forget about all the material items others may have, forget about the superficial clicks, and stop doing things just because others are doing them. FOCUS on what is important! Your family will be there even if everyone else leaves, once you loose all the superficial stuff you can connect with other people that like the same things you do and build strong, lasting friendships, don't stress/worry over body flaws...your body will be changing a million times throughout your life, don't be a follower!!! Find your own path, and don't be concerned about the stereo types from people that are not capable of being real. Remember that even though people act one way in school, there may be a million issues going on at home for them. Look beyond the shell they present on the outside and look for true beauty within. Don't be a gossip!

As a Mom, I have tried to teach my son so many things that will better him, as a person. I don't tolerate lies, he understands that women can do anything a man can do, he knows that family is always the first priority, that education is not only important but ongoing throughout life, that having faith/spirituality in some form is highly important, that having a good work ethic will take you far, being willing to earn the material things he wants but doesn't need isn't easy, understanding that just because there is some new gadget on the market does not make it better than the tried and true, and above all else, staying true to his own beliefs and values will never steer him wrong.

I have tried to be sure that both my kids understand the importance of family. You know they've heard it a millions times, when even my 6 year old told everyone at her birthday party, "I love my family!" Since we home school our kids, I have the privilege of having 3 meals a day with my kids, we sit down at the table together, eat and share information. We do our studies together, and I learn right along side of them. Although I may be teaching them their subjects, they are teaching me so much more! We do not deal with superficial in our house. We do not try to keep up with anyone, and those that do get to spend time with us can not be that way either. We don't care if people wear name brand clothes or shoes, we don't care they have brand new vehicles or Flintstones mobiles(for the adults reading!), We don't care if you are rich, poor, or somewhere in between. We care about loyalty, being real, and being around people that share our values. We have plenty of flaws, have plenty of areas that we could improve, but we are who we are. We love to be at home, with our family. We would rather sit around our bonfires, work in our gardens, work on anything around our farm, than spend any time with people that are superficial, gossips, and trying to keep up with the neighbors.

These are the values we are raising our kids with. These are the values I wish more young people had. I know from the few years our oldest was in public school, that kids today are cruel. They have no class, no respect, and honestly...many of the parents don't either. When I see a child speak to their parents with so much disrespect it not only makes me cringe, but makes me want to shake the parent and ask why they allow it. To see the kids and some adults, walking around with the jeans hanging half way to their knees, just ticks me off...I have offered to buy many belts! To see the girls wearing barely there dresses at junior high level, I think...there is no freakin way will I ever allow it, let alone encourage it! Then you have the girls that wear the shorter than short, shorts or see through shirts and all I can do is shake my head. These things are never acceptable! Girls, have some respect for yourselves! Cover your bodies. Any guy worth catching their attention, will be attracted to your mind and your personality! That brings up another area that has me a little touchy. This whole dating thing, in junior high. Really?! Girls and Guys alike...it's great if you find someone you like, it's great if you spend your time together, but to listen to all the drama that goes on, it makes me question the logic. I have told my son, having girl that is a friend, is great. Since 99% of any relationships that are started in junior or even high school ever work out, it's more important to be friends. Yes, I know I will catch grief for that but how I see it, I know a handful(5) couples that got together in high school, and only 1 of them is still together. I am not a hypocrite, since I know what I did though high school. I am however, trying to save my kids a little grace, a little frustration and a whole lot of headaches. I know they will do things that will be questionable in value...that's part of being a kid and growing up. However, my kids will have many morals, values, and lessons to be able to face their lives. They earn my trust, they know they can talk to me and I will be honest with them. I will share what I know, my feelings and thoughts, but it's ultimately their decision to be respectful, honest, loyal, and follow our family values. If I do all the choosing for them, they will not become the responsible people they should become.

I am so glad that my son has found some inspiration from someone that is so levelheaded, from a good family oriented television show. With so many of the "reality" shows out today, at least there is one that has some of the values we stand for.

Salli